Saturday, August 29, 2009

H is for Hmmmm

The story of Jaycee Lee Dugard has drawn a lot of interest lately, but for me, it draws interest for slightly different reasons. There are questions that I'd like to know the answers to, questions that probably won't be answered.

I mean, we all read the Big Media Story, like the MSN one linked above, right? 11-year-old girl is abducted, kept as sex slave by sex offender Phillip Garrido, who had two daughters by her. But other parts of the story just didn't seem to be being brought out. One minor thing - I'd like to learn more about Nancy Garrido, Phillip's wife, who assisted in the kidnapping and then the 18 years of imprisonment. Was Phillip more evil that Nancy? Probably. Probably a lot. But I'd hate for the woman who helped every step of the way to get off scot-free because she cuts a deal.

But even more than Nancy, I wondered about Jaycee's fathers. Her step-father, who tried to run down Phillip and Nancy (the abductors) on a bicycle as they zoomed away with Jaycee in her car, and I also wonder about her biological father. Very few words wasted at MSN on the man who was raising Jaycee, or the man who fathered Jaycee.

The Sacramento Bee provides a bit more robust information, letting us know that the step-father Carl Probyn is 'separated' from Jaycee's mom. Elsewhere we read that they have been separated for 10 years. However MSN indicates that they are divorced:

"Probyn has been in constant contact with Dugard's mother, his ex-wife Terry Probyn, since she found out her daughter was alive on Wednesday. "

The money quote comes from AP, found here in the LI press:

“It broke my marriage up. I’ve gone through hell, I mean I’m a suspect up until yesterday,” he told The Associated Press at his home in Orange, Calif. “I’m the last person to see her.”

"I'm a suspect up to yesterday." Add it to how the cops and probation stumbled over every opportunity to catch the real abductor, and I think we can wonder if it isn't true that the cops had their suspect - the step-father, and looked no further, torturing this man and his wife until their relationship was destroyed.

And what about the biological father? Help Find The Missing tells us "Dugard's biological father was quickly ruled out as a suspect; at the time of her abduction, he did not even know where she was living."

One wonders how it is possible that a father doesn't know where his 11-year-old daughter is living. Mostly, one would. And I'm starting to think uncharitable thoughts about Terry Probyn. Living in the real world, I see too many men cut out of their children's lives, and wonder if in fact Jaycee wasn't abducted twice. Once from her biological father, and once from her biological mother and step-father.

I wonder what Jaycee's biological dad's name is? Was he paying child support? What about Carl? Alimony? Support? This is, after all, California.

The real story - the big story - is the rescue of Jaycee and her daughters, and the stupidity of the police - and that stupidity does seem to have part of its origins in misandry - the misandrous focus on the step-father to the exclusion of others, and the failure to do the right kind of investigations and do the right kind of monitoring with respect to Phillip and Nancy Garrido - Phillip, who as I read it, should never have been let out of prison.

But one wonders about Terry, and Jaycee's biological dad, and why it was and is so easy to ignore him, perhaps cut him off from contact with his daughter, and why it was also so easy, and perhaps financially attractive, to toss Carl aside too. Inquiring minds want to know.

My Best To You In Your Struggles.


Another look at this story - Stockholm Syndrome/PAS


One poster asked why we care -thought that this was all sick - and I think that deserved an answer, and one that should appear in the post:

I care because my default opinion that men are good, and that Jaycee's biological father was a decent man who was cut out of his child's life. I don't assume he was bad, or that he abandoned her, and I think perhaps his story needs to be told - but it isn't.

I alsso care because I see that the stepfather clearly spent years and years as a suspect, and whose marriage was destroyed as a result.

It is too easy to suspect fathers, and too easy to discard fathers.

That's why I care.

Update on Jaycee's biological dad from the comments:

The Daily Mail says: "Jaycee's natural father, Kenneth Slayton, split up with her mother before she was born and has never seen his daughter. He is said to live in the Los Angeles area but was not available for comment last night."

Again, we have a third name. Seems that Jaycee's mom likely named someone named Dugard as the dad.

Your comments and thoughts are welcome, and please hit the ‘Donate’ button, if you can.

My Best To You In Your Struggles



Anonymous said...

This whole thing smells funny. Confirmation of who the father of Jaycee's children are is critical. Those tests could not have been completed prior to the media reporting Dugard was the father. Jaycee may have been hiding from Probyn. Dugard and wife have plead not guilty to all charges. The media is not trustworthy. Why no statements by Jaycee, her biological mother or father. All we get is Probyn, who have as interest in clearing his name.

MisAnDrope said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
MisAnDrope said...

I am pretty sure that Jaycee's daughters are Phillip Garrido's children. Apparently they look quite like him. Also, they were born too long after the abduction for the step-father to have been involved, and we assume reasonably that Dugard couldn't have been involved. But genetic tests will tell!


Deadbeat Dad said...

"Living in the real world, I see too many men cut out of their children's lives, and wonder if in fact Jaycee wasn't abducted twice."

The same thought crosses my mind every time I read a story of child abuse (or, worse, homicide) and there is no mention of the natural father.

Good piece, MisAnDrope.

Jake said...

Google and then some.

Jaycee's bio father could be said to be worse than Garrido.
A web site dedicated to this stuff is web sleuths.
Just before all this kicked off last week in a forum thread which had discussed the bio father a bit somebody (jashrema) found a .pdf which is linked to which states that he raped Jaycee in May 1991.
I have no idea how Jaycee's mother ended up with this guy. Surely a one-nighter/fling. I think she was lucky to get away with her life.
He's name is James Daveggio. He's looking for pen-pals if you're interested.(jk)
OK I don't know if I can direct link so you might need to copy and paste.


Daveggio timeline .pdf.,%20James%20_fall,%202007_.pdf

If you go to Websleuths and find the post about half way down you can click a direct link to the .pdf.

MisAnDrope said...

Strange stuff Jake...
How do we know or think James Daveggio is Jaycee Dugard's Biological Dad? Where did the Dugard surname come from?

I checked the references on that timeline, but they don't mention the rape of Jaycee, so it isn't clear where that info came from.

Jake said...

Oops sorry I got my wires crossed although the .pdf rape thing is weird.
The bio father is Kenneth Slayton.
Sorry about that.

MisAnDrope said...

Ah! Knowing the name gives us a little more to go on - the Daily Mail says: "Jaycee's natural father, Kenneth Slayton, split up with her mother before she was born and has never seen his daughter.
He is said to live in the Los Angeles area but was not available for comment last night."

Again, we have a third name. Seems that Jaycee's mom likely named someone named Dugard as the dad.

DivorceDadsNetherlands said...

In search for the story of the real (biological) father of Jaycee I came on this blog, thnx!

Anonymous said...

You people are rediculous! Why do you care so must who the bio father is? It is certainly none of your business or anyone outside the familys! He is a great father and man. YOu should think about getting FACTS before you start running your mouths.

MisAnDrope said...

I care because my default opinion is that he was a decent father who was cut out of his child's life. I don't assume he was bad, or that he abandoned her, and I think perhaps his story needs to be told - but it isn't. And the stepfather clearly spent years and years as a suspect, and says that it destroyed his marriage. It is too easy to suspect fathers, and too easy to discard fathers. That's why I care.

Anonymous said...

Ken Slayton is Jaycee Dugard's biological father. Jaycee was given the name Dugard because that is her mother's maiden name.
Ken Slayton and Terry Probyn met on a weekend camping trip and continued a relationship for about a month. Ken Slayton said Terry Probyn told him she was pregnant, and he was the father. Ken Slayton told Terry he had doubts he was the father, and he said Terry "disappeared". Ken Slayton said he didn't know if Terry had an abortion or had the baby.
Slayton admitted on a radio interview that Terry lived with her parents in Anaheim,Ca. during their relationship (Slayton lived in Brea, Ca. 7 miles away), and he knew her parent's phone number.
Terry Probyn said in a statement last year that she told Slayton she was pregnant, and he showed "no interest". Slayton said he heard from a "mutual friend" aproximately a year later that Terry had the baby, "it looked like him", and the "mutual friend" indicated Terry didn't want him to know where she lived. Slayton said he tried to "call the numbers he was given", but "no one answered". He then said the phone was "disconnected". He also said he wanted to continue searching, but he lived in Sacremento, Ca. (300 miles away) at the time, and he as time went on, it was "out of sight, out of mind". Terry Probyn said in the same statement from last year that she also told Slayton when Jaycee was born, but he again "showed no interest".
Slayton said he "didn't know for sure that he had a daughter" until the FBI and Sheriff's dept. knocked on his door after Jaycee's kidnapping. He said they told him was "most likely dead". Slayton vowed that if Jaycee was found, he would be a father to her after being denied by her mother.
Terry Probyn said in her statement that she asked law enforcement to ask Slayton to contact her, and she said Slayton didn't contact her, nor help with the search.
Those are the facts that I've been able to dig up. Both Slayton and Probyn have different versions of the story, or they give different facts even where there is agreement. Terry Probyn didn't publicly say much, but Slayton gave a lot of interviews. He paints himself as a "wronged father", but his statements and actions say otherwise.

Anonymous said...

It's very clear that Slayton knew Terry was pregnant, and he knew that she had the baby the following year. It's also obvious that he knew where Terry lived and her phone number. She didn't just "disappear" like he was trying to portray. It's clear he had doubts he was the father. More than likely, he simply didn't bother to try and contact her after she told him she was pregnant (after basically inferring she slept around). In fact, he was probably hoping she wouldn't contact him again and deliberately avoided having anything to do with her. What's really funny is that Slayton was living in Brea, Ca. (7 miles from Anaheim where Terry lived) when Terry Probyn told him she was pregnant. Yet, Slayton was living in Sacremento (300 miles away)a year later when he learned Terry had the baby. What was he doing in Sacremento? Who was the one who "disappeared" when he heard Terry was pregnant? Connect the dots people. The details differ about how Slayton found out Terry had the baby, but I'm inclined to believe Terry Probyn. Slayton's lame attempts and excuses about how he "tried" to find Terry, but couldn't sound like a bunch of horse manure. Slayton clearly said that he couldn't be bothered to try and find Jaycee beyond a couple phone calls because he was too far away and couldn't "just visit". Well, how about a letter? Did he look in the phone book or call information? Jaycee was born and raised in Garden Grove, Ca. (right next to Anaheim-same county too.)until she was 9 years old. Terry Probyn didn't marry until Jaycee was 10, and she had the name of Dugard the whole time. Slayton could've checked the county records for Jaycee's birth certificate. It would've had Terry's address at the time. I guess that's too much because he would've had to travel. Did he try Motor Vehicles? The actress, Rebecca Schaeffer's killer found her that way. That's all public access. If he couldn't go to Anaheim, did he bother to hire a paternity lawyer or private detective to find her for him? DNA paternity tests weren't available at the time, but they did have HLA bloodtyping which was fairly accurate for the time. I know a couple fathers who hoped to be cleared of paternity by dna, but it only confirmed what the original bloodtests said. Slayton made statements denouncing Terry Probyn for denying him a relationship with Jaycee. Again-horse manure. This guy knew about Jaycee the whole time, and he didn't even bother to try to make any real effort to find her or take responsiblity. What's worse-he wrote her off as "dead" without even trying to help in her search. I can understand that he might have felt uncomfortable pleading for her return on TV (like Terry and Carl Probyn)since he never met her. But there was plenty he could've done. Think of all the volunteers who didn't even know Jaycee, and they searched the countryside for her, answered calls on the hotline, and donated money. Slayton couldn't even be bothered, and now, he shows up at the worse possible time trying to force a relationship on a rape victim and her daughters who traumatized enough by men without having another STRANGE MALE telling them what to do. He claims he isn't a stranger because he's her biological father even though he probably couldn't pick her out of a line-up. Of course, he puts all the blame on Terry Probyn. Why is it these guys think women should move heaven and earth to involve them in their children's lives while they make little or no effort themselves? In Terry Probyn's view, she put the ball in Slayton's court, and he didn't bother to return it.

Anonymous said...

Statement by Nancy Seltzer on Behalf of the Dugard Family


It has come to our attention that Kenneth Slayton is attempting to petition the court to establish paternity and we wish to avoid the terror of a process server for Jaycee Dugard and her mother Terry Probyn. We are therefore affirming that Terry Probyn told Mr. Slayton when she learned she was pregnant that he was the father and again when Jaycee was born. He showed no interest..

The police advised him when Jaycee was kidnapped and again he showed no interest. Terry Probyn asked the FBI to arrange a meeting with Mr. Slayton and herself after the kidnapping and the FBI found him uninterested. The Eldorado Sheriff's department interviewed him and he again showed no interest. At no point did Mr. Slayton offer any assistance beyond what was requested of him while Jaycee was missing.

Terry Probyn has never denied that Kenneth Slayton was the father. Rather it was Mr Slayton who showed no interest for the first 29 years of his daughter's life.

It is now Jaycee Dugard's turn to express her feelings and she has no interest.

She does not wish to see Mr Slayton or his family at this time.

Jaycee reserves the right to reconsider at a later date.

DNA does not make a family!

Anonymous said...

"the misandrous focus on the step-father to the exclusion of others"

Carl Probyn, Jaycee's stepdad, was given a lie detector test where he was asked if he ever resented having a step daughter. Carl Probyn answered, "Yes." Jaycee said in her grand jury testimony that she always felt like Carl "didn't like her" and "always wanted to send her away" when she lived at home. Statistically speaking, a stepfather would be very likely to hurt or kill a stepchild. Why wouldn't the police concentrate on Carl when it was well known Carl resented Jaycee? It's unfortunate that Carl was branded a suspect, but without any other leads, who can blame the police or the Dugard family for suspecting Carl? If a man marrys a woman knowing she has children, he has no right to treat the children the way Carl treated Jaycee. That's not misandry. Most people would've suspected him as well. Maybe if most children weren't molested by fathers and stepfathers, men wouldn't have a bad name.

Charity said...

I see a lack of gratitude for all the information & efforts of Carl Probyn to find Jaycee.

Anonymous said...

"I see a lack of gratitude for all the information & efforts of Carl Probyn to find Jaycee"

Jaycee Dugard said in her grand jury testimony that she felt Carl "didn't like her" and "was always trying to send her away". Jaycee ended up living with an aunt and uncle for a year prior to the family moving to South Lake Tahoe. Jaycee also said Carl was always making comments about him, Jaycee's mother, and his daughter Shayna being the "three musketeers" while excluding Jaycee. Jaycee was 11 years old, and she believed Carl didn't want her around. It's obvious from Jaycee's memories of Carl that he certainly didn't do much to make her feel like a member of the family for cripe's sake. Jaycee said she couldn't leave the Garridos because she felt she had "no place to go". She didn't think Carl wanted her around, and she certainly didn't have any reason to believe Carl would accept two daughters fathered by a rapist. She was only 11 years old when she was kidnapped. Her last memories of Carl weren't good. It's unfortunate Carl was blamed for Jaycee's abduction all those years, and yes, he did try hard to find her. However, how much of that was fueled by his own guilt? He told the police he sometimes wished Jaycee wasn't in their lives. To feel that way about your own stepdaughter and to have her kidnapped so terribly must've made Carl feel like a big asshole. But that's not Jaycee's baggage. That is Carl's baggage, and Jaycee has a right to feel anger toward this man. Eventually, she might come around, but right now, she probably feels like he deliberately tried to come between her and her mom rather than act like the father he should've been especially since she did not have one. Than, she's kidnapped, raped, locked up in a backyard, and forced to bare two children fathered by her rapist. A rapist who than forces her to pretend that he is her "dad" and she is her daughter's older sister. OTOT, Jaycee is finally reunited with her mother only to have her "real dad" suddenly shows up demanding a DNA test and threatening legal action if he doesn't get it. A man who didn't want anything to do with her the first eleven years, who didn't bother looking for her after her kidnapping, and is now trying to blame Jaycee's mother for his lack of interest in Jaycee to begin with. And this guy has the nerve to say he wants to be a "positive male role model" to Jaycee and her two daughters. AFter being raped and kept prisoner, having a "male role model" trying to force her into another "father-daughter" relationship is the last thing Jaycee needs or wants right now. It's just another man trying to come between Jaycee and her mother as far as Jaycee is concerned. No wonder this girl doesn't want a so-called "father figure" in her life right now. What next? Should she be forced to take her children to visit Garrido in prison in the name of "fathers rights"? Jaycee will meet Carl and Ken Slayton when she is ready and if she wants to. She shouldn't feel like she has to out of some sense of "gratitude". Anyone who doesn't get this has to be stupid or cruel to even judge Jaycee about this.

Tanya said...

Just finished reading Jaycee Dugard's book "A Stolen Life". Carl Probyn was an emotionally abusive stepfather almost to the point of being sadistic. As far as the bio dad goes, Jaycee said she and her mother, Terry, lived with Terry's parents and sister Tina in Anaheim, Ca. until Jaycee was 4 years old. The bio dad said Terry lived with her parents in Anaheim when he was dating her. This guy said Terry told him she was pregnant and then disappeared. How can Terry disappear when she was living with her parents the entire time? WTF? Like people are going to buy that.