P is for Protect Yourself

Another problem that presents itself to men in divorce and separation is what happens when you lose you job.

You can find yourself building up arrears while your ex collects 65% of your unemployment, and sues you, claiming you aren't searching hard enough for the next job. When you get the next job, she may sue you claiming that this job pays lower than it should have because you didn't do an adequate search. And the odds of being sued in these ways are high, because traditionally, the man (whups, the 'presumed higher wage earner') pays for the lawyers fees. So she's got nothing at stake.

To protect yourself you need to keep a record of who you sent your resumes to, who you spoke to, and what kind of networking and investigations you did in hunting for your job. You also need to track salary information for these jobs (if available), locations you looked in, job titles and the like.

And this isn't a joke - the burden of proof in one of these cases does not fall upon the accuser - the woman - it falls upon the support-payer; the man.

It is up to you to prove that you are doing or did do an adequate search to the court, and show where you searched and how.

I have been there, and I know.

They want to see how many folks you contacted, if you followed up, and where the jobs were located, and are liable to parse this data closely. It's a big deal. And if you fail to prove that your job hunt was sufficient, then you get the joy of 'imputed income', which is where the court pretends, for its calculations that you are making your old income. (i.e. when the facts don't allow you to come up with your insane support numbers, just plug in the pretend facts that will help. Nice.)

BLATANT PLUG:

So to deal with this documentation/job search issue I use a job networking tool that has good job-hunt reporting, called 'The Job Networking Assistant', from Anonymous Developments, who have just rolled out their latest version. The software costs a big $20, and automates your job search and networking efforts in a way few tools can. It autodials, generates professional-looking customizable emails, pulls up maps of job locations, tracks referrals, and a lot more. Upgrades are free, and revisions generally roll out every couple months. If you are a divorced person hunting for a job, this may be the best $20 you ever spent.

The standard version of the software is available for download as a free trial - just follow the link here.

Oh, and I get a big piece of the action, so do buy it and use it - it's good for networking, even if you haven't lost your job or aren't divorced or separated!


My Best To You In Your Struggles

-M

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