Monday, December 22, 2008

B is for Bad News

I sat with a lawyer the other day.

See, a friend of mine, a female friend, refused to believe that things could be the way I say that they are.

That men just can't win in our court system.

That the things that happened to me could be true.

It would be all different, if I just hooked up with a GOOD lawyer.

She knew a couple. She would get me a name, or two.

And she was true to her word. She did exactly that.

The lawyer was even semi-encouraging on the phone:

He thought I probably would want to do a motion for an adjustment, because I had been out of work. He said the judges were becoming more sympathetic.

So I came in and sat with him.

And we started to go over the things that had happened, would happen in court.

The presumption of guilt, the legal fees, the ignoring of perjury, the requirement that the man somehow pay, even when he has nothing.

I went over everything that goes on in court, everything that does go on.

"Right," he said "So It wouldn't make sense for you to file a motion, given your experience."

The lawyer wasn't going to tell me the bad news. I had to tell him. Had to tell him that going to court wasn't worth it, that there was no winning. He would let me blow as much money as I wanted chasing the elusive dark angel of family court justice.

And other bad news. I wanted to know, when a job transition to a lower pay grade would be considered permanent. "A year? Two?" The answer was - "We'll see when you get your next job."

But what if I don't get a next job anytime soon?
"The court really won't look at it until you get your next job."

So if you are out of work, and can't find any work, the bad news is that you can't get any relief, can't even get considered for relief until you get that next job.

And while we are on the subject of 'Next Jobs' and 'Bad News', please look over on the left.

I have added a 'Donate' button. I have big numbers to do to stay in a house this month. I don't know if anyone can spare a dime, but I would appreciate it.

Please give generously.



MisAnDrope said...

Personal bits - I have been working hard all this time trying to nail the next job, and couldn't bear to blog. I was in such a dark place. Now, I seem about to hit bottom, and so perhaps things must go up from here. Perhaps.

Look for more frequent blogging in the future.

Deadbeat Dad said...

Hey, MisAnDrope. Great to see you back in the saddle again, blogwise at least. Hawaiian Libertarian has done a great job in your absence, but your unique voice has been sorely missed.

Sorry I couldn't help you out with a more substantial donation (it's more of a gesture than anything else), but my financial situation is possibly even more wretched than your own -- I was a successfully self-employed as a freelance I.T. consultant before the family courts messed with my head a few years ago, and have been living hand-to-mouth (sinking deeper and deeper into debt) ever since. And I know plenty of guys who have gone through the same ordeal.

Has there ever been any attempt to assess the economic damage wrought on families in this way by the family courts? Not that I know of.

Hang in there.